Friday, September 30, 2011

Same Old, Same Old

Every season I end up reading half a dozen articles that contain something like this: "blah blah blah hemlines, blah blah blah patterns, blah blah blah THE know what I mean. The truth is, hemlines of varying lengths will always be available to suit our personal preferences, patterns of every stripe (little play on words) will always be around, and you should only wear colors that flatter you, regardless of whatever the IT color is that season.

Fall 2011 shows us retro 60's and 70's looks, mixing in menswear, ladylike, rocker chic, boho accents and some faux fur and leather for good measure. So much. Too much? What's not to like? Well, I'll tell you....

I read an article the other day where the writer, an actual fashion writer, was questioning "shooties". Apparently she had not heard the term before, a description of footwear that is shoe-ish yet boot-ish. "Honey, (my inner dialogue said) shooties have been around for at least 3 years, this time around." Two years ago I couldn't afford a pair; last year I bought an excellent suede and snakeskin pair, and you're questioning their existence just now??!!

                                  I am a shootie. I am peep-toed and ruffly. Aren't I pretty?

That's not my own personal shootie above, but you get the idea. So, this being the third year this type of shoe/boot hybrid is available, why is it that someone who should know better doesn't know. I don't like my fashion writers to be uniformed. (So that's why I read a lot of fashion blogs instead...)

Something else I don't like: the bringing back of ugly clothing. If it was ugly in 1987 or 1967, why bring it up again like a vurp? Case in point, 2009's 'strong shoulder' jacket was just a new way to say "I'll have some more of that dopey Dynasty look"....Let's just admit it here and now - the only women who ever looked, who will ever look decent in big fat overstuffed puffy shoulders are Linda Evans and Joan Collins. In fact, these two should be forced to wear that look forever. To remind the rest of us not to go there.

                                           See my shoulders! I am woman, see me catfight!

 What was ugly in 1967? Well, maybe Nicole Ritchie can wear a string around her forehead and look nutty, but that's not for me. The 'Hippie Look' was generated by those opposed to The Establishment (which people are now part of...) as a backlash against corporate greed. The 'Asian Look' was trying to become a part of our world, but let's face it, Asian clothing only looks good on Asian women. And ah yes! Russian Cossack styles were being shown on the Parisian runways. Just what a Cali gal needs: a nice full length maxi-coat with a huge blob of fur on her head.

What happened to the Cold War? And didn't we just blow up half of Japan a few decades before? And kick Korea's butt? Was this payback? I don't like it when fashion tries to force extreme and inappropriate styles down our throats.

                                                           Yum! Big dead animals on my head!

                  What a cute little cheongsam. Back away from the Asian dress, white woman.

So, I don't like writers that don't know what's going on, then and now, and I don't like stupid fashion. Is good fashion and good writing too much to ask?

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